project-beast:

why do people hear “fantasy” and think “british and irish accents”

know what i want? i want a fucking dark souls chosen undead goin round swinging their sword shouting “Y'ALL'DVE”

arabwife:

me: *is overwhelmed by things i absolutely have the time to do*

space-pollen:

I am a professional at misreading tone and overreacting to problems that most likely don’t even exist

pluralfloral:

eunnieboo:

so a few days ago i sat down for dinner and my mom handed me the camera with a strange look on her face. all she said was “you need to see this” and i was like ?? okay

but then

that is my dad with a pigeon on his head.

SO OF COURSE MY REACTION WAS JUST “WHAT?! HOW??? HOW” and APPARENTLY when my dad was outside gardening, he saw it land on the roof of our house. and then it just. flew down. and landed on his head

BUT NOW IT WON’T LEAVE

like the other morning i stepped outside to call my dad in for lunch and the pigeon was just sitting on the front porch watching him work

best friends forever

THIS IS THE DREAM

mossandrock:

dimedog:

“I wish I had the time to do that.”

- me, a person who definitely has the time to do that but also has terrible time management skills and most likely to just spend 4 hours getting absolutely nothing accomplished instead of the hundred other things I could and should be doing

I feel personally attacked by the accuracy of this post.

thejunglenook:

khaleesri:

“no homo” I whisper as I look at my garden of pea plants. The progeny had expressed a 1:2:1 ratio of phenotypes. I am Gregor Mendel. 

This joke is lethal

scorntrooper:

Team “I imagined a scenario too hard and it upset me”